insomnia

Insomnia is such a double edge sword. While it slowly tries to kill you through the hours of the night, it makes you angry and stressful at the helplessness of the situation.

“empty your brain, close all the doors,
don’t let a single wisp of a thought enter
or cross the threshold!” That’s what the yoga teacher
says!

I try, and the word “wisp” visualizes like smoke, like
nebulous doubts and clouds in a clear sky. No, get rid of that
thought; clear my mind; nothing should cross the
threshold! And one thought leads to another~~

I think of the threshold at home, about twelve inches above the floor. How
easy it was for my little nephews to stumble against it while they
ran around playing, and the tears and the hurts of falling down. But,
I cannot think of that.

I have to clear my mind of all thoughts. How do I do that? Even the
clearing and sweeping of thoughts, brings about moving pictures
in this mind, and I hear ‘insomnia’ laughing at my imprisoned
helplessness.

©ZSA December 2014.

About Zakiah

I write poetry and some fiction, have a book that was published in 2012. . . Stray Thoughts/Winged Words. I have four grandchildren, ages 16 and half to almost 16 months. I love the ocean, and grew up along the Indian Ocean in South India. I am a retired physician. Don't know much else to say. Thanks for reading. That has been my profile for so many years. My daughter Saadia a great poet and story teller, has two sons; the oldest grandson is now 21 years old, doing architectural engineering at Missouri S&T in Rolla MO. His younger brother is almost 16 and taking driving lessons seriously and is in High School. The other two grandsons, children of my son Sayeed, are 9 and 5. I have recently published another book titled Gulistan, A home of Flowers. It has stories and memories of my childhood and of a distant land which I still consider as my HOME., even though I have lived here in the US for more than fifty years. Hope to see you on my blog.
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13 Responses to insomnia

  1. kaylar says:

    is this true, for thee? i am coming of an age, where it is becoming true for me. but i am lucky enough to not care about the hour. i can get up and nap later, any time of day or night.
    i know, seriously blessed, i am.

    • Zakiah says:

      I have a serious problem with insomnia. Every night I wake up like around 2 a m, and am up till almost 4:30 or 5. Sometimes I sleep through, till about 4 or so, and then I cannot go back to sleep at all. I think it is all from the time when I used to work and would get calls from the ER, and didn’t mind staying up or going to the hospital to see the patients. It’s become a way of life now. 😦

  2. Humor_Me_Now says:

    HI Dr. Zakiah. I am sorry to hear aabout your insomnia. I have and a number of firends with that malady. I wish there was a good answer for you. I have it once in awhile.

  3. sunsetdragon says:

    I like this and it describes sleepless nights so well. Hugs.

  4. Sorry about your insomnia. I have trouble sleeping sometimes and yesterday was one of those days. After Marc went to work, I laid down and finally got some sleep.

  5. I’m so sorry you suffer from insomnia, SweetZ. 😦
    Your words have captured insomnia well.
    I have trouble getting to sleep, but once I’m out, I sleep well.
    And I have a pre-bed routine that helps me get to sleep.
    (((HUGS)))

  6. Your insomnia seems to be worse than mine. It’s been better since I’ve gotten back from vacation. It might be from your old routine. For the longest time, my dad always woke up early to get to work. Even in his last year, he would still wake up early and this was long after he retired.

    I hope you can find a way to get rid of it.

  7. I’m sorry to hear of this. Is there something you can do while you’re up?

    It’s almost 4.30am and I slept after dinner and woke at 10.30pm. I just like to stay up – I rarely sleep at consistent times, but I think this is just how I am, and not insomnia or anything. Still, I probably should try and sleep consistently.

  8. sistermae says:

    I have terrible sleep habits I think I am part vampire or something the sun goes down no matter how many hours I have been up and awake I cant sleep the the sun comes up and I really want to sleep. It is a crazy roller-coaster ride

  9. Zakiah says:

    That’s a good word Mae… “napping”. I nap through the night. That’s what I do!

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